Inga's Space

The Memory of an Elephant

2011-03-03T14:57:00.002-06:00

Have you ever forgotten something very important? During those hectic "out- the-door moments", we tend to forget things, like keys, planners, cell phones, and the like. These issues can be easily remedied by strategic planning/placement of items in the future.

What happens when you forget important events that only come once in a lifetime, a wedding (ideally), birth of a child, first steps, meeting a significant person in your life? As we get older, our memories seem to cloud up. Photographs and journal entries are nice stimuli to spark that memory, but sometimes even those trigger a response.

In today's society we are bombarded with information at all hours of the day (how did we survive without cable television/CNN/internet!?!?). How can our brains filter the information effectively to keep the "good stuff" or the pertinent information and let the other information get recycled (environmentally friendly thought)?

It frustrates me that I can vividly recall insignificant events like the infamous "Bronco chase", yet, recalling specific events from a trip to my family's homeland seems to be a clouded memory. (They occurred within 5 years of each other).

The LOSS of innocence

2011-02-22T08:53:00.003-06:00

MTV has (or had) "Skins,"16 and Pregnant" and "Teen Mom". Noticing a theme?? Not only are we "glamorizing" sexuality at an early age on television, I hear songs like Britney's little ditty "If U Seek Amy.." (seriously??) amongst countless others that have sexual undertones.Yesterday, I heard a Rhianna song on the airwaves titled "S &M" with lyrics such as: (and your kids are probably singing along!)

"Cause I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it Sticks and stones may break my bones But chains and whips excite me"

WOW... glad I have a young adult child and not a tween in days like this. Messages through media (what I have mentioned is just a sample) are stripping the innocence of childhood. I know there are others out there with books like Cinderella Ate My Daughter by Peggy Orenstein that are debunking the princess culture of young girls. Boys are getting the message that girls are collateral, yuck!(my interpretation)

Our government is endorsing NASCAR yet de-funding public television (well, there IS that Katy Perry wardrobe fiasco ;) ) & public radio programs. Where are our priorities?

Parents of the US, please be in touch with your kids viewing/listening habits. I know that having discussions about issues can be taxing, uncomfortable & time-consuming. Raising your kids in a socially appropriate culture is worth the hassle, no?

Intelligence

2010-08-31T10:28:00.003-05:00

After hearing this conversation on Speaking of Faith on "The Meaning of Intelligence", I thought of how much "manual" labor in our society is discredited. Yet, without those willing to to such labor, how ever will the extravagant buildings and bustling roadways ever be complete? However insignificant these tasks seem, they are necessary for progress.

On one of the recent blistering summer days, I surprised my postal carrier for her duty by leaving her an icy bottle of water. Acknowledging her work during that time made her feel valued.

Having "intellectual" conversations with people can be quite enlightening, keeping my brain synapses in constant motion. Yet, there are opportunities to discuss the mechanics of a task that sometimes seem more favorable.

Makes TOTAL sense

2010-08-27T11:32:00.002-05:00

Quote from Andy Warhol:

"They always say that time changes things but you actually have to change them yourself".

I've noticed the truth of this statement in my most recent transition of my son leaving for college. The house is empty of his daily presence and my daily routine no longer involves juggling the car keys back & forth. I miss some of the hecticness that kept me grounded, yet I find the calm left behind almost pleasant. Investigating new opportunties encourages me to change my routine, because if I leave it as is, I will be running in place, going nowhere.

Simplicity...

2010-07-29T01:16:00.002-05:00

Photograph by Alan Ross

Black and white photography captivates me. Light and shadow creates a unique dimension that we rarely see with our eyes. The process of catching this balance has been a challenge in my photographs. Ansel Adams was a pioneer in this art and several have followed. I thank them for the talent they posses and give me goals!

Certainly not like Monet!

2010-07-24T09:41:00.003-05:00

A trip to the Art Museum makes me feel inspired to be creative. Perusing through the expansive galleries is a trip through history. When ancient people had nothing more than the tools they created with their bare hands, the meticulous handiwork astounds me.

Today we are provided with gadgets and instructions how to recreate masterpieces... why not establish your own!?

I attempt to free my mind of life's distractions prior to making a trip to the museum in order to fully appreciate the talents of those who toiled (or perhaps not) hours, months, years to create the works that grace the walls of our local (and FREE) cultural venue.

Occasionally I feel a bit intimidated looking at these pieces, frustrated at my limitations in the realm of art. The "mind's eye" is complex going from concept to the process of delivery. Photography is the most satisfying as it is the most direct route.

Perhaps when freeing up my art/creativity space, I shall surround myself with...

artful inspiration!

Love your local...

2010-07-22T19:05:00.005-05:00

I adore mom & pop shops! With commercialism at its peak in this decade, the independent merchant is struggling to survive (if they haven't already succumbed to pressure) against the "big guys". You are certain to see me perusing the aisles of those stores for the necessities weekly. When looking for a special occasion gift, a hard to find culinary item or unique book, I am more than likely popping into an IR!

Here is a local bookseller (Subterranean Books) that is a refuge for me!

When looking for unique cooking ingredients, I am apt to head to Global Foods and end with a full cart of culinary delights!

Plowsharing Crafts is another gem in our town! All sorts of cool items from all over the world. Like a museum that is hands on (mostly). Earlier this week I saw crucifixes made from empty bullet shells from Liberia. The artist wanted to create peace after the awful devastation that struck that country... I seriously got chills holding it in my hand & reading the card.
On a lighter note... the "singing bowls" are Gabe's go-to item. (I think if we bought one he would never use it).

I could seriously have a whole blog (hmmm??) dedicated to the local merchants that I support or know people directly affiliated with them. Should you ever be so inclined to visit such an establishment in "the 'Lou"... my suggestion is YES! We will all be better off because you did!

Literary Feast!

2010-07-15T10:40:00.003-05:00

I have not visited my local library as often as I had last year. I was pleased to see that the previous construction was finally complete. When pursuing my newest literary adventure, I quickly realized the collections had been rearranged. New genres such as art, design seemed to be coaxing me to investigate their pages.

Whatever happened to....

2010-07-13T09:32:00.005-05:00

random acts of kindness ? Since technology has prevailed in our daily lives, we seem to have cocooned ourselves with headphones, smart phones, mp3 players and assorted electronic media as we journey through our daily lives. The external populous has become white noise in the background.

Customer service (it was once referred to as the 'courtesy center') is more of a "job" such as helping a customer locate a hard to find item or escorting customers to their car. If another some caring citizen were to help an individual to their car, we would immediately jump to the conclusion this person may be some type of perpetrator intending harm.

Yet, when people are asked to help with locating a missing person, donating blood, time or food for a cause, people consider it an intrusion.

Society seems to have become a catalyst for selfishness. Materialism (hell, just watch television for 1 hour on a weekend Saturday morning, that is where it all begins!!)

I dont think I am cruel...

2010-07-05T22:01:00.003-05:00

With this awful environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico, there has been a concerted effort to save the wildlife of the area. Today I was listening to NPR's Talk of the Nation which brought up the matter again. (Previous story )

The statistics of the longevity of these birds after a rescue/recovery from previous events tells me it is damn expensive & not very effective. Granted that the current "spill" (PLEASE, that is no spill... it is an epic mess!!) encompasses a greater area than previous incidents, but if it is so expensive, shouldn't we look at focusing BP's dwindling bankroll on the people whose livelihoods have been impacted in such a devastating way?

Perhaps rather than trying to save a majority of the "visible" wildlife (who cleans off the fish & shrimp... ) maybe focus on salvaging enough to save the species. Euthanasia may be better than putting these creatures through the traumatic process only to die off either during the process or days afterward.

epipheny

2010-07-03T12:45:00.003-05:00

I have come to the conclusion that those who have dark souls should not procreate!

I have returned!

2010-07-01T21:27:00.002-05:00

After a month long absence, I realized that I missed blogging... mindless rambling... whatever!

Since I am still living "hand to mouth", I have been draw to discover FREE entertainment. Recently learned about the podcast phenomena. I've been aware of their existence, but delved deeper in the Internet to find all sorts of interesting music, educational, science informational pod casts.

I am a pretty avid NPR listener... enjoy the educational component. Currently the Morning Edition portion has a series about the Criminal Brain. It has been a fascinating show. Brain chemistry, nature vs. nurture and genetic predisposition. Although the information presented is just a glimpse into the research which is essentially in its infancy stages, I am seeking to learn more! I recall how mundane science courses were back in high school & college. Total respect for the field!

Outta the ZONE... comfort zone

2010-05-21T23:02:00.004-05:00

Can I say that Senior year of high school has to be one of the most expensive years of school (other than university). Since I wasn't working, funds were at a critical level, so every expense was evaluated for priority. So the studio pictures for Senior year didn't happen. I was going to have a photographically talented friend take on this task, but alas, the family schedules never seemed to gel at the same time. I took on the task with some trepidation, as I seem to work best with objects & animals rather than people. But.. time was slipping away and quickly. Grabbed the point & shoot digital, kid & a couple of outfits & head to a local park & then I have always enjoyed the sitting on the train tracks pictures (I see it as a metaphor for the long track ahead in life...wherever it may lead) so I planned out a trip there as well.

The time of day was less than desirable for a couple of these shots, but we actually had sunshine of a good portion of the day & I had to work with what I had. Regardless, I am rather pleased with several of these. I see room for improvement for things I may do in the future.

When bringing these to a local photo kiosk, I had an employee tell me that making unauthorized copies of professional photos was against policy. With a big grin I told him that I took these photos & he then inquired if I was a professional photographer. Hmmmm?Made my day!

Control

2010-05-19T14:49:00.002-05:00

I live in a house filled with control freaks! Each one of us has a particular way of completing a task. Heaven forbid if you leave something incomplete!

Example: the yard was in desperate, DESPERATE need of cutting today. We have had a previous week of rain & cool temperatures which did not aid in the drying out. I had cut around the property line & the driest sections & was going to return to do the "swampland" portion after a bit of a break, letting the mid morning sun dry stuff up a bit. Next thing I hear is the lawnmower running & my dad is out there finishing up the lawn. Seriously, can one not wait a mere 30 minutes?

My mother is just as bad about laundry. I have a pair of slacks I may have worn for 2 hours end up in the washing machine when she ends up doing a 3rd load (daily). Ridiculous!

I know that when women are pregnant there is a "nesting"instinct. I am curious if as you age, a similar pattern emerges, kind of like "finish all your chores before you no longer can do it independently" mentality.

I love my family dearly, but the aging thing is not going well for either of them. I consider my 98 year old grandmother who until a couple of years ago was still climbing ladders to prune trees in her backyard. This woman is beyond amazing. On her 98th birthday last week, she was re-potting plants as her method of celebration. I hope I have inherited some of that stamina!

Comeuppance

2010-05-13T10:26:00.002-05:00

I have re-entered the work force on a part-time basis, yet I am acquiring additional opportunities for more hours. Quite a shift of pace for not only me but the family as well.

My son has entered the "blogosphere" after inspiration from some of his peers. 13 days in & he is blogging almost daily. Luckily I have been given clearance to read it! So, I must take heed that the student has surpassed the master in yet another facet. I am totally okay with this.

We are almost at the end of the tunnel of high school... a mere 12 days until the graduation ceremony. The frenzy of end of the year banquets & award ceremonies has ceased, leaving us with tranquility for a brief moment or two.

Watching him grow.....

2010-04-26T19:49:00.007-05:00

My son's final high school prom was this weekend. How quickly the 4 years went! I gathered the 3 consecutive years of obligatory photos prior to the event by the "parent paparazzi"....

Orchids

2010-03-23T20:52:00.006-05:00

One of my favorite events at the MO Botanical Gardens

The structure of these flowers are stunning...

Got Apathy?

2010-03-22T23:41:00.002-05:00

(It has been quite a while since I last posted... not from apathy, just life)

Tonight I attended one of the last 3 board meetings of a parent group I support (and have for 4 years). Since my son is graduating, I will no longer be on the board, but will transition into a member role. The past 2 years, I have seen the same 8-10 faces attend these meetings yet I know that there are several other parents of students that could attend. Even when I was employed full time, I made an effort to attend meetings and get involved. It saddens me to see the group disintegrate into a group of 3 families supporting kids.

When starting in HS, you were overwhelmed with invitations to join the XYZ parent booster club of various activities & then there is the abyss of the school sponsored parent organization that was WAY too large of an umbrella to join. I opted to stick with the activities my son was involved in, a more direct route. In the past few years I have seen students become leaders in particular areas, yet I only see the parents pop up at performance time to bask in their child's skills. By no means do I expect to have near the involvement of elementary school, but sheesh! There are plenty of opportunities for parents to get involved in a way that is not too time-consuming. I am sure the kids notice the absence/presence of parents in the periphery of the activities.

I recall in middle school/high school when I played soccer. Dads & moms would be on the sidelines at home games shouting words of encouragement/frustration at their daughters. My parents never came to any games. I doubt my performance would have enhanced, but I just remember the emptiness when the game was over. My mother says that she would have been appalled if her parents attended one of her events as a teenager.."that was our time to do our thing". She attributes it to her generation.

Sure, society has changed with both parents working crazy hours (if they are lucky enough to still be gainfully employed) and there may be young children at home or other family matters to handle. Is 1 hour per month average too much too ask of parents? I can imagine they spend at LEAST that on self-indulgent activities.

For the last 9 weeks (hard to imagine) of my son's high school run, I am going to continue to show my support & hope that others take notice. Hope it sets a precedent!

Not what I expected...

2010-02-25T09:20:00.002-06:00

Last night, my son & I attended a performance of "Dog Sees God" at the university he will be attending in the fall. Initially, I was surprised by the size of the theater. It has a capacity of 250 which is 1/2 the size of his high schools. I will say that the acoustics were fantastic and it does make for a more intimate performance.

Now, for the actually show. I knew the premise of DSG (the Peanuts characters created by Charles Schultz have grown into teenagers and a pivotal event starts the show), but I knew this was an "edgy" show that was not endorsed by the Schultz estate.

The characters certainly have "issues" that are contemporary to society.... didn't they always ?
Many instances of colorful, harsh language was off putting at first but finally the storyline developed into introspective exchanges between the characters. Not all the characters are lovable, although they make light of the adolescent rites of passage.

The conclusion of the story is quite moving. Laughter had subsided, replaced by a few smiles when honest observations were stated in a melancholy manner. As an adult, I look back through my life & see people in my life who played a role.

As the pen pal correspondence was read, I will admit I teared up, such sage observations & the final puzzle piece was set in place.

It is definitely one of my favorite live performance shows.

Art Imitates Life... or is it the other way around...

2010-02-21T20:28:00.003-06:00

A guilty conscience needs to confess. A work of art is a confession. --Albert Camus

A man paints with his brains and not with his hands. -- Michelangelo

Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.--Thomas Merton

I had a bit of an epiphany today. I was visiting a local art gallery and chatted for a while with one of the artists in this co-op. He had some health issues & turned to his art for comfort... also realized he is able to make some money as well as share his talent with others.

I have been creating resumes, re-creating resumes & completing application after application without much luck the past 10 months. Art has been my conscience nagging in a whisper throughout this process. Perhaps I need to give my artistic energy some time in the forefront and see what happens... shifting perspective.

Girl for Hire

2010-02-15T17:28:00.000-06:00

What does a girl need to get work in this town??

Current resume -- check
Glowing references--- check
Complete Work history detail---check
Professional attire-- check
Decent interpersonal skills -- check

I've done the song & dance plenty. I know what employers are looking for in an employee (I WAS the one inerviewing employees). As sincere as I am in these meetings, I really want to end the interview with.... "So rather than wasting any more time & energy, this job seems pleasant enough, just tell me now if my application is being tucked away by the time I leave this parking lot".

Occasionally I see potential in a position & I then learn from the cold voice at the other end "Oh... we forgot to update the website, sorry, we filled that last week."

I know I am a capable individual that can adapt to many environments, but it does get discouraging to get a foot halfway in the door to learn they just needed a doorstop.

Back to the drawing board....

Frigid....

2010-02-15T15:19:00.004-06:00

Seeking to find natural beauty in this time of year. Cold temperatures and grey clouds seem to drain the creative spirit. Caught a glimpse of the sun & had a moments inspiration....

Valentines Day... more snow!

I call these "branch-cicles". I will have plenty of work come spring..... enjoy this as it lasts!

Rites of passage

2010-01-28T22:40:00.002-06:00

My son is in the final months of high school. It is the "lasts" of several things... last parent/teacher conference, last xyz event... it is getting to be quite realistic at this point. Not too many tears at this point, just a sadness.

I was taken aback the other day realizing the expense of raising this child of mine! I played with some generic numbers & I am amazed I have not needed to take out a loan for him! I stopped calculating when the $ amount reached $135,000. That is a small house!!! (And I haven't added the college expenses).

As the kids in high school have their Senior Skip Day, Senior Prank (hope no one gets arrested), and all the camaraderie, parents are left in the shadows crunching numbers, reassessing monthly expenditures & praying the scholarships come through.

No rest for the wicked...

2010-01-17T22:53:00.002-06:00

On one minute writer the subject is rest for today.

HA! I recall when I could rest leisurely on a weekend morning with a book & a cup of coffee in the living room or back patio. Those days are long gone. Whether it is household chores, running errands, meetings or medical appointments, rest is sometimes a foreign term in this household!
We live in a combined household, as my parents are older & we still have my bother who is autistic living at home still (really not fond of options). Therefore, since I am relatively "able-bodied" I am the go-to person for things.

As I am writing this I am finishing up laundry, letting the dog out and sitting with my brother until he falls asleep. So, is this resting? Eh? I am physically resting (all well & good) but mental rest! AH... that is what I crave the most. How nice to have your mind go somewhere peaceful. I think the only time I do that is when I listen to music... mostly instrumental. It is like a cerebral spa that wakes up synapses in your mind that have been neglected.I usually do this when I am doing housework and when I go to bed, although with the events in Haiti, I've been listening to BBC-World Service to keep in the loop. Now there are some people there that need to rest!

As my good mate, Forrest Gump once said.... "that's all I have to say about that"

Haiti...

2010-01-14T20:33:00.004-06:00

http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/americas/01/14/haiti.earthquake/index.html?hpt=T1

The television news stations are riddled with images such as these. As I sit in my relatively spacious intact home, watching the footage of the aftermath, I have a surge in my stomach, (perhaps my soul) that aches for these people.Their lives just getting back to normal from a hurricane a few years ago. And now this.

Lives changed forever, children left orphans (one baby was shown 15 days old... mother was crushed in collapse, infant just had lacerations, cared for by Dr. Sanjay Gupta), parents losing children.... just horrific reality. And it IS reality. Just, not ours (directly)

Feeling helpless, what can I do? I contact red cross (line is busy, go figure,) end up e-mailing a list of my abilities, skills and contact information, I have little $$ to survive on myself (unemployed for a year and a week), but I have 2 hands and a caring heart that can , and need to help.

A simple yet honest quote I encountered:

"All that matters is what we do for each other." -- Lewis Carroll

Putting it on the back burner....

2010-01-09T22:40:00.002-06:00

Single parenthood is not for the timid. I did not dream of being a woman who would be raising a child on her own. Like many young girls, there would be a handsome, romantic, successful gentleman to sweep me away into a life where we would create a home that mirrored something off "Leave it to Beaver" or "Family Ties". **enter reality check**

So my knights wore aluminum foil (flimsy) and rode on a donkey (or were just a plain ass). I realized that the family unit was not a mutually exclusive vision for my little family. We went our separate ways (keeping our son in the balance... well, some of us tried).

Fast forward 15 years... still no knights in my future. However, I have learned that I am a strong, independent, relatively intelligent female that can fend not only for herself & her little lion cub, but her whole family unit. Granted, these past years have been riddled with trips to the hospital, shouting matched, slammed doors, hurt feelings and tears (yup, plenty of those).

Now that my son is 18, I see life changing, quite rapidly so, in a great way. When he was 15, he was eager to get his first "real job", as a bagger at a grocery store. He was promoted to the grocery department, but realized that wasn't his style & went back to bagging. Opportunity knocked when the coffee shop opened in the store & he jumped on that! He had been there almost 3 years. Great work ethic for a kid that age.

Academically, he is finally challenging himself as he did as when he was in elementary school. He has great attendance & is quite involved in school activities. He's had a few "gotcha's" not turning in homework, but the majority of his work is on track.

College days are drawing closer & closer. He has a handful to choose from & we are working together to make the best decision for him. I am rather amazed of the dialogue that comes with this. He is a great critical thinker.

This weekend he was awarded a scholarship for his pursuit of a theater education degree & the realization that I have raised this fellow essentially solo & he has turned out to be a remarkable individual. He may not be the athlete that his father wanted him to become, but making himself available as a parent was not a priority.

It is overwhelming at all we have accomplished. I remember clear as day when he was a toddler holding his hand knowing those days would be a sweet memory & hoping that I would be a "good enough" person to be a single parent as it was becoming evident this was the inevitable road we would be traveling. By no means am I super mom, I made mistakes, said things aloud when I clearly needed to hold my tongue, but I did my best to do right by him in my heart.

I am proud of my son, for being the genuine person he has become. I cherish our mother/son relationship and the honesty of our conversations. The days with him living in the nest are dwindling too quickly, yet I am eager to see him take flight.

It's not the childhood dream that I had, it is better!

A new view...

2010-01-04T13:02:00.007-06:00

My son apparently knows his mother relatively well. For the Christmas holiday, he gifted me a new digital camera & an SLR camera. He had loaned me his digital frequently as my 1st digital was a mere 1.3 megapixels (a gift from my father back in 2000) and was not quite keeping up with the demands I had on it.

The SLR is used and the lens filter has a chip (easily replaced, when funds start flowing again) and is missing a lens cap, again, fixable. However, feeling the body of the camera, looking through the viewfinder to see that fabulous little window on the world is delicious! I began playing with photography in high school & dabbled in developing photos for a bit in college as well. As I grew older, I was distracted from the hobby. With the explosion of digital media/photography, I began admiring work from others and I found myself taking potentially great photos with less than stellar equipment. (Although, regardless of equipment, some photos are just fabulous in their existence).

This year, I will cherish both of my gifts by using them to create portraits of my world. So many opportunities lay in waiting & I am looking forward to reacquainting myself in the photography realm!

Hello 2010...

2010-01-02T20:07:00.002-06:00

A new year is upon us, finally. Not the best of the 2009 for this family.

Typically, people make resolutions, right? Well, we know how many of those end up as a blurred memory by Groundhog Day.

I am sort of putting a spin on the concept and making a to do list (aren't goals just dreams with an end date attached??). Curious if this list gets 50% completed by Dec 31. Time shall tell....

1. Write & publish a short story (either locally or online). I was published in a newsletter regarding having a sibling with autism, which although cathartic, it was quite an enjoyable experience.

2. Enter a fabulous photo of mine (taken with either a SLR or digital in this calendar year) in a contest for serious contention.

3. Pay off debt. I have been working on this for 2 years but I will clean it up (pending a steady paycheck) no later than Oct 31.

4. Take a real cooking class--- serious technique stuff, not "How to Boil Water 101" in the local school adult education brochure

5. Make a lunch date & actually keep it with friends I have reconnected with recently. (The caveat here is that "keeping it" is contingent on family health issues).

6. Journal 6 stories from my grandmothers youth. Somehow I will have her tell me a "story" rather than get blown off. At 97 she is still coherent about her time in Lithuania/Germany & I want to have some of her legacy in print. I also need to do something similar with my parents. My REAL goal is from my grandmother's memories.

7. After I lose 5 pounds/inches, gather clothing that no longer fits & donate to a shelter.

8. Make 10 blankets for NICU & bring them to hospital.

9. Repaint/redecorate at LEAST one room in the house. Redid the main bathroom this year & other than removing the wallpaper, it was quite inspiring.

10. Take a camping trip with the family this year. We all need to get out of town for a bit. I think one last family vacation before Gabe leaves for university will be cohesive for out family unit.

** Okay off to print the list to post it on the calendar board. Watch for progress.... ♥

So long 2009....

2009-12-31T21:59:00.002-06:00

Made it through another 12 months. It certainly has been filled with new experiences & some scary moments (no more sitting vigil in hospital room, thank you!)

1. Realized my family is a dynamic that is quite convoluted, but damn wonderful when you get through all the crapola on the surface.

2. I met several unique and talented people through Chesterfield Arts this year. It has awakened the creative side of my brain and inspired me to try new avenues (and get back to things I enjoyed doing years ago).

3. Becoming unemployed was a mixed blessing. I no longer feel the choke hold of the corporate office on every interaction/conversation. Albeit economically, it was a jolt, I used this opportunity to re-evaluate my consumer/spending habits. Just stunned at how much piddly expenditures you "throw your hard eared $$ on" when you have a steady income. Society sure wants you to swipe that card at every opportunity, which, I really haven't done in the past year.

4. Expanding on the career portion, I forgot what a gerbil cage I was in the past decade... wow, poof! Hello world!! It is quite different being out the child care world. I do miss the unbridled hugs/kisses/tackles that enveloped me on a daily basis & miss watching the kids grow into their own personalities. I think that part of me shall live forever, because that is who I am.

5. My son turned 18 this year... milestone for me! I can honestly tell people I have raised my son! Senior year of HS is zooming past. He is really active in theater at school (starred as a pirate in Peter Pan, also did some technical flying in that show, this Fall he starred as Scrooge in "A Christmas Carol", he is also directing a one-act play, the Stage manager for "Thorougly Modern Millie" and cadet teaching a Theater I class this semester), not sure where the other academics will fall into place, but he made a 3.2 GPA so far. Sheesh! I am actually going to miss this pandemonium!

6. Since the local radio stations are succumbing to Big Brother-type conglomerates (or disappearing off the airwaves completely), I was seeking an outlet to keep a pulse on new artists, world music and any collaborations my favorite musicians have in the making. I used the music feature on our TV from our cable provider & dabbled a bit on Yahoo/MSN/Pandora etc. I discovered BBC radio and have enjoyed this so much. Completely varied format from the states, where artists talk about MUSIC not the LABEL they are under contract. I am also investigating music at the library before I purchase (a downloaded track) to make sure I can listen to it over & over and not tire of it quickly.

7. This e-book thing is not my cup of tea. I downloaded a couple of books via the library to get the experience. I can read a blog, newsletter, article on a computer screen, but there is something personal about holding a physical text copy. I will not be on the bandwagon & will support my local bookseller (shout out to Subterranean Books in UCity!) until I am no longer to read the print on a page.

8. Teaching my parents the ropes of a cell phone & internet has been a treat. The cell phone has come in handy with all the medical stuff we have had as a family & we were able to keep in touch waiting to hear results of surgeries/procedures. Let me see, at last count we had 7 medical issues this year. As late as it is tonight, I pray we have no more for another decade!!

9.She was not trained to be, however, our dog, Chloe, has become a support dog for my brother. This is the year she grew up (she is now 3) and has perfected some of her commands. She watches for him dutifully by the front window in the family room, notifies us when he wakes up (or will help do just that if we mention it) and corrals him to his room & stays with him until he falls asleep. Who knew?!?

10. I intend to make the best of the upcoming year & decade. I am entering my mid-40's and plan to make these next 3 + decades something I can look back on proudly. I am going to take better care of both my physical body & spirit as I did about 20 years ago. I want to be active like my grandmother had been up until the past 6 years (she is 97 & still gardening/cooking but I know her light is fading, just being selfish to want to keep her around longer than she is willing). I need to let her know that she has been a role model for me in a way she will take to heart.

So, year of adventure, disappointment, discovery and loss, I bid thee farewell. I have taken to heart the cards I've been dealt & played those that I could in good faith.

Here's to a new year of hope & wonder. Please shine a little love on us this year....

Cheers, all!

I am not made

2009-12-13T18:09:00.000-06:00

I Am Not Made

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I am not made for this
I’m not strong enough
I’ve often wondered late at night
What it’s like to stop
What it’s like to have the world stop
Stop right under my feet
And start turning the other way instead

Maybe if I don’t think
Some strength will return
Maybe I could push the world around
Spin it on the tip of my finger
Get it moving again
At my pace
Let it beat in time with my heart

I think I need some strength
Just until I’m alive enough
To start living again
To start turning again
I could find someone to be my world
Someone to be my strength
I think it’s time I found some

God, please rip me up
And start again
Just like you did with the world
Do it to the Earth again
Find some way to help me
Some way to get me some strength
God, please help me start again

I might just apologise
See if I did anything to be sorry for
I might stop talking
And close up in myself again
Just like the old days
Before I had the world
And lost it again

I am not made for this
I am hurting too much
To be thrown back out in the cold
Alone and insecure
Without my world at all
I am not made for this
I am not made

Poem by Perfect Fool

Grinch-logic

2009-12-11T20:36:00.000-06:00

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.

- Dr. Seuss

It's...... showtime!

2009-11-14T11:26:00.003-06:00

Gabe is in the midst of his senior year of high school. A great opportunity presented itself when he auditioned & was selected for the role of Scrooge in "A Christmas Carol".

As a theater parent, I have been helping behind the scenes with costumes & other incidentals. I've had a chance to see glimpses of the show emerge into its final stages. My son has shown so much leadership with this production. He's embraced the cast & crew (and chastised them as well and has steered the team into the right direction. Who knew I would ever enjoy spending evenings & weekends with teenagers?!!

Way to go Marquette Theatre Company.... keeping up the reputation of professionalism in performance!

Break a leg..... love you all!

Where is MY pot of gold?

2009-09-29T19:37:00.003-05:00

After dodging raindrops that would fill a tablespoon, I dashed home to get a shot of this rainbow. Every time I look at a rainbow I seek to identify each color, ensuring each one was accounted for.

Robotic

2009-09-22T19:24:00.002-05:00

Today's Writing Prompt: Robot

If you could have a robot to help you, what task(s) would it do? What would its name be?

This would be a welcome addition to the family.

Tasks:
*walk dog
*dispense/remind medication for each family member
*unload dishwasher
*laundry start to finish

His name (why a he? mm, because I would make him adorable) would be Adonis! ;)

Are you a teacher?....

2009-09-20T22:02:00.002-05:00

This weekend, I was manning a booth at the local Strassenfest for an agency at which I volunteer There was a color/cut/assemble/embellish activity for the kids. I'm a natural with kids & although I haven't been around the littler set for a while, I guess I haven't lost my touch. Parents were helping the kids 'hurry' through the project. I explained this was a great time to just enjoy the quiet time with their kids who were actually occupied. Funny how some dads had their Blackberries out or stood back with their beer mug while the moms took over the role. After encouraging some of them, the dads did start to get into the activity @ some level. Some of the assembly I would walk the kids through in a patient voice & let them do the work. Several parents would ask, "Are you a teacher?" I would admit by training I was, but had been out of the classroom for several years. I was told that the most frustrating part of the project I kept the kids involvement whereas they would have just "lost it" with the kids & just done it to get it finished.

Every child left with a big smile on their face that reminded me why I got into education!

I posed the question to several families, perhaps it was rhetorical, maybe not...

Funny how we encourage our children to get into art projects... "go on, try it", we tell them. However as adults, we shy away from this area. Why is that?!

Guess people were too busy with all their adult business to consider creativity!

In the cool, cool, cool of the evening...

2009-09-13T22:04:00.003-05:00

My life has been quite a whirlwind of activity (unusual for an unemployed gal, no?) the past few weeks, keeping me from posting my innermost thoughts.

I am entering a chapter in my life that is quite foreign to me. Aging, medically bound parents, a brother with special needs that doesn't comprehend the challenges they are facing & reacts with his own series of issues.

Then, my son is getting closer to high school graduation, applications & letters piled up in our mailbox daily, postcards from XYZ University touting statistics on glossy cardstock, it's all approaching at once. (** I'll be glad once the decision is final... the mail carrier has been getting quite a work out)

I am trying to "get" where my parents are mentally with this whole aging process. My father seems to be fighting all his medical battles rather well, although I hear his heavy sighs every so often. Mom is all emotion about the issues she faces. I do wish she took more interest in the life around her & be less of a recluse. She is content with library books & listening to music/watching TV. I encourage them to go out on a "date"somewhere, but reasons come up to stay home.

I wish they they would go out, learn something new... keep their minds alive with new ideas, people, etc.

I enjoy the place our home has become. Not just the physical improvements/decorating of the building, but the "feel" of the house. It seems to be a smoother run system of chores/duties & the ambience is tranquil (compared to walking in after working a 10 hour day with a list of grievances & duties to attend to within the next 3 hours if I was to get any sleep).

Granted, financially, this unemployment was a blow. However, as a family, it allowed us to re-evalute what our priorities are. I felt really guilty intially, thinking that all the health issues were being kept at bay because I was not able to get off work to help with ???. I got over it eventually & channeled the energy to become the family health/medical/household manager.

Putting things in order helps me get my mental chaos in check. Just uncertain how the cards we've been dealt will be played out in the end.

awakening

2009-08-13T00:45:00.001-05:00

awakening

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Brothers are awesome

2009-08-05T21:53:00.003-05:00

My brother adores ice cream. He's pretty particular on his choices as well. DQ has the best soft serve in his book. Tony also enjoys people watching, which I think make other people nervous. Hey, he's been on the receiving end of that for so long, he's due for his chances. The thing is, he knows when people are staring & he'll show off.
Gotta work on curbing that!

Well, hello there!

2009-08-02T22:09:00.010-05:00

This new exhibit is going to be amazing. We have a traveling exhibit of Seward Johnson's works that is quite entertaining.

Here is a glimpse of what has popped up around town this past week:

Exam time

2009-06-15T23:44:00.003-05:00

Looks like I am the "bad guy" tonight. My teenage son is out about town on some scavenger hunt with friends who will be leaving for college. We have agreements (or so I thought) about checking in & answering calls when out. I suppose it is super "uncool" to have that connection, but with our family situation, it is a necessity. Several hours into this event, he chooses NOT to respond to call but texts me info that he'll be back within the hour & can't talk.

I am all about the peer bonding thing! I thrived in it every summer when I was a camp counselor. But there does lie a certain responsibility which needs to be upheld. As a single parent, I get the "best" of both worlds. I have fumed enough, put my thoughts & consequences in writing....

He's home, safe (pissed off at me, no doubt). Here comes one of those great tests of parenting 101...

Scrap By Color - Color Schemes For Scrapbook Layouts Using Your Photos

2009-05-22T10:21:00.001-05:00

Scrap By Color - Color Schemes For Scrapbook Layouts Using Your Photos

Posted using ShareThis

The power of ONE

2009-05-14T23:42:00.005-05:00

Tonight I experienced one of those heart warming moments as a parent. My son had campaigned to be president of his high school theater club. There were 2 other people running for the office as well.

Prior to the reveal of the officer positions, the theater teacher/director had mentioned that the person who was elected by one vote. She went on to speak of the power of one voice, one person, one chance. So, that part alone got me thinking how my son had taken a chance, put himself out there to be judged by his peers (something I NEVER would have done @ his age, I liked my anonymity then). I reflected on the passion and energy he had in composing his speech late into the evenings, the diligence he took with his campaign posters (never recall such nice writing). Today, he brought 2 trays of brownies for his theater group of friends & wished his competitors a "happy president's day"...cute gesture.

So, here we are, the big moment. Each current officer has a bag of items to welcome the new inductee. The current president revealed that it was one of Gabe's competitors & I had a small sinking feeling in my heart, but only to be welled up with tears of pride to see him rise to his feet to give her a standing ovation. He was honestly thrilled that she got the position. She was crying out of disbelief & joy that she got the nomination. His friends give him hugs and offer kind words, knowing he really wanted the position, but he never gave anyone the impression he was upset. Gabe gave me that knowing wink from across the room & the tears came streaming down. This was my boy, now I see the man he will become. A good hearted man who gives it his all, regardless of status.

He ended up with some other notable recognitions; the only underclassman (not a senior) to accumulate over 50points for the International Thespian Society and the 2009 most promising Technical Theater Award as a Junior.

I am feeling the good karma tonight for my son.

I believe in the power of one!

Tag, you're it...

2009-05-12T22:57:00.002-05:00

Rules: Answer the questions. Replace the one question you dislike the most with one of your own, AND add one question of your liking. Tag five untagged people. Ready? GO!

What is your current obsession?
Knitting, I just re-learned it after many years. Love it!

What are you wearing now?
My comfy worn out cotton shorts that I refuse to surrender & a jazz festival t-shirt from volunteering. Looks like I won't be acquiring any more since they are on "hiatus", 8 years was a good run, though.

Do you nap a lot?
I do catch myself finding napping opportunities every so often. If I nap too long, my whole internal clock is out of whack can't get to sleep at a decent hour.

What is under your bed?
A rug that’s actually supposed to be in the middle of the room. No matter how often I move it back, it inches slowly, day by day, on its own back underneath the bed.
Hopefully, the match to a tennis shoe that my dog ran off with about 20 minutes ago. Also several dust bunnies have reconvened for their weekly reunion.

What would you like to learn to do?
Teach my dog to channel her energy on an agility course, I enjoy watching the championships on Animal Planet, and I think Chloe does, too.

What’s for dinner?
We had buffalo chicken wings, zucchini spears & rice. Bananas Foster with ice cream for dessert.

What was the last thing you bought?
lemons, cheese & french bread.

What is your favorite weather?
Today was a fine example, upper 70's & sunny. Tonight we had some thunderstorms, which seem hypnotic to me.

If you could be anywhere right now, where would you be?
With the gang of girls in Boston! I am outnumbered here!

What is your most challenging goal right now?
Deciding on the priority of full time employment versus part time work. Family needs have come into the forefront the past 5 months and I now realize that I've neglected that responsibility more than I can explain. I know the answer is right in front of me, I just feel the need to over analyze the concept!

Why do you blog?
I initially started to share pictures, then I enjoyed posting thoughts and personal observations for others to share

what would you like to have in your hands right now?
A cup of chai latte or something to drink.

What do you want but can’t have right this second?
A massage (preferably by an attractive, unattached, virile male who has a few hours to spare)

What languages can you speak?
English, Spanish & Lithuanian (it's a lot of work but I can get by)

What language(s) do you want to be able to speak?
Something lyrical like French or Italian

What's one thing you're looking forward to?
An upcoming theater banquet that will determine if my son was elected as President of the theatre company and if he will be a cappie for the next school year. These things have taken over all dinner conversations. The anticipation is growing weary!

What websites do you visit constantly during the day?
CNN,Two Peas in a Bucket, Blogger, bank, Facebook and BBC radio

If you could only listen to one artist for the rest of your life who would it be?
Dave Koz, I swear he is working on the soundtrack to my life!

If you had all the time in the world, what would you do with it?
Good stuff! Help people, be creative, and travel while doing the aforementioned.

What is your favorite time period?
Renaissance.

When you are unplugged from technology, what activities do you enjoy?

I enjoy reading and spending time with my son. I've determined that if we are playing a card game, chess, mancala or some other non mechanical activity, I am able to catch up on what is important in his life at the moment. I relish the positive relationship I have with him. I recall a time when I couldn't answer things like his favorite color, biggest fear, favorite subject etc. That was an eye opener for me.

I am tagging: Ana, Lynn, Vanessa

Well, hello there!

2009-04-21T15:36:00.002-05:00

Our pup was causing a commotion at the patio window. Went to see what was amiss, only to find a couple of Canadian Geese stopping by...

Truth in fiction?!?

2009-04-20T20:05:00.003-05:00

So, I will be the first to admit I am a skeptic. If the forecast calls for 3 " of snow, or that I can clean my shower with the flick of a switch, I am the stick in the mud staying , "I live in the 'show-me state'!!"

On a recent trip to the library, I encountered a book on colorstrology--- the concept is that you find your birth date & it will reveal your "color" and describe your traits.

Step 1. Locate birthday; Jan 27 (easy enough) Hmm... the page is polignac (purplish hue), I like purple(coincidence?) The opposite page is lavender... oh, a mere 24 hours!

Step 2. Read character traits: adorable, interesting, and unusual . Okay, so a lot of people qualify for those traits (check other dates in book to see how often those come up, several).Okay, close. I would have chosen "giving, quirky, and curious" but that's just me talkin' here...

Step 3. Passage excerpt "There is something about you that people just love. It may be your innocence (translated as naive) or your unusual perception of life that keeps people enamored (that's a stretch). You have a strong sense of what is right and wrong, you care deeply about humanity. Friends are important to you, so be sure to surround yourself with the right people." Uh, okay. Pretty accurate. Skeptic says.... "read on".

Step 4. Locate other family members birth dates. Colors are relatively compatible with each person. Characteristics are mostly accurate (my mother's was WAY off in my opinion). My son's & brother's seemed to be the most accurate. We even tried the dog's... it was dead on!

So, I guess some of these -ology books may have some entertainment value. I certainly wouldn't live my life by this stuff.

My son says, "Mom, hate to burst your bubble here. We just studied this stuff in Psych & the traits and characteristics are worked so generically that people can find similarities in most of the stuff out there". Well....yeah! Like those people that reportedly can speak to the deceased, just watch the way they talk to the loved one, it is such a scam!!!

Let's just refer to it as
"BRAIN CANDY"
(looks & tastes good but isn't nutritious)
and call it a day!

Knowing...

2009-04-19T23:15:00.002-05:00

Things I would tell my younger self now that I know...

* The grass may be greener on the other side, but it still needs to be fertilized, cut, reseeded.

* Looking into your child's eyes can make everything right again, even if just for a moment.

* Always, trust yourself first, no matter how close you are to someone, you never really know what they are capable of doing.

* A broken heart hurts like hell, but you do come out stronger on the other side of the pain.

* Blood is thicker than water.

* This, too, shall pass. It may not be the outcome you wanted, but you learn something from the experience.

* True friends ask how you are, and actually listen for your answer.

* Remember to keep a sense of humor, especially in respect to yourself.

* Going out to a museum, dinner, event alone allows you to meet interesting people. At first it seems awkward, but knowing all the amazing people I have met by doing this, it was worth the risk.

* Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Do one thing that scares you every day". You will be surprised by the results.

* You never get tired of reading a GOOD book.

* There are REAL moments in your adult life where you actually say, "I am becoming just like my mother". (remember... humor!)

*Parenting is difficult, frustrating, exhausting, overwhelming, and worth every damn second!

* Be honest & consistent with your kids, they can see right though you!

* Beware of tunnel vision as an adult. Look at your surroundings. Some of the most beautiful and important stuff is on the fringe of your periphery.

These were several of the thoughts that were swarming my brain last night. Perhaps it was because I was looking at my son all dressed up for Prom, coming to the realization that he will be graduating high school next year.

Just wanting to put them down in a tangible form for future reference...

New things...

2009-04-14T15:15:00.002-05:00

In keeping with my philosophy of learning new things, I signed up to join a knitting class through the local library. Armed with needles & an open mind, I sought out my librarian buddy, Norma, to guide me on a new adventure.

A little knitting philosophy taken from a tote bag I saw..

You have two eyes.
I have two needles.
Do the math.

I think casting on is the most challenging part so far. Well, that and finding quiet, uninterrupted time to knit (and count). Once I have something to photograph, I'll post my creation.

Afraid So...

2009-04-02T16:15:00.002-05:00

With the "extra" time on my hands (i.e when all is quiet & everyone is sleeping), I have been able to read more in the evenings. I am revisiting poetry which is quite portable & not a huge time commitment. I find the response to all these questions amusing, yet soberly honest. Writing like this, makes my day.

Afraid So

Is it starting to rain?
Did the check bounce?
Are we out of coffee?
Is this going to hurt?
Could you lose your job?
Did the glass break?
Was the baggage misrouted?
Will this go on my record?
Are you missing much money?
Was anyone injured?
Is the traffic heavy?
Do I have to remove my clothes?
Will it leave a scar?
Must you go?
Will this be in the papers?
Is my time up already?
Are we seeing the understudy?
Will it affect my eyesight?
Did all the books burn?
Are you still smoking?
Is the bone broken?
Will I have to put him to sleep?
Was the car totaled?
Am I responsible for these charges?
Are you contagious?
Will we have to wait long?
Is the runway icy?
Was the gun loaded?
Could this cause side effects?
Do you know who betrayed you?
Is the wound infected?
Are we lost?
Can it get any worse?

Jeanne Marie Beaumont

Who's the fool now??

2009-03-31T18:16:00.003-05:00

When in doubt, make a fool of yourself.
There is a microscopically thin line between
being brilliantly creative
and
acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.

So what the hell,
leap.

Cynthia Heimel

Simple enough...

2009-03-31T14:49:00.001-05:00

”Treat people as if they were what they ought to be
and
you help them to become what they are capable of being.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

It's all coming back to me now...

2009-03-30T23:48:00.003-05:00

Inspiration

When I initially became an educator, I was ready to take on the world. I was young, passionate, resourceful and naive. I was assigned children who were diagnosed with learning disabilities and behavioral disorders only to have them become exemplary students within a few months time. Believing in the children & their capabilities was the first step.

Mr. Esquith was able to demonstrate what a wonderful experience education can be. In his writings he tells tales of co-workers who feel his classroom is an exercise in chaos. Oh, if only I could work in the same facility as him & tap into that energy & dedication!

Rereading his books has begun to re-ignite my passion for education again. My adult brain had been cluttered with legalese, licensing regulations, policies and procedures that were "conventiently applicable" in prior employment venues. With that melee aside, I will now replace it with the inspirational words of educational professionals that demonstrate the passion that I once did to create a future society of caring, well-educated citizens of the world.

Peace to you, Rafe!

3 decades...

2009-03-24T10:44:00.002-05:00

A high school friend pointed out today that we have known each other for 30 years! That seemed unreal until I did the math.

She & I have gone through so many milestones together; crushes, rejection, teenage drama (not staged), college years (ooh, more un-staged drama), weddings, births, raising children (I actually managed the preschool that her children attended for a few years). This was comforting knowing that despite the lack of constant contact that we thrived in the younger years, we are able to maintain a friendship with less frequent contact (thanks in most part to adult responsibities and hectic schedules of our kids). We have recently begun recalling silly high school memories since our kids are in that age range (mine son is finishing his Junior year, her oldest is a Freshman & her youngest is starting middle school next year).

I cannot even fathom what 40 + years will have us sharing... I look at the list above and feel a tad overwhelmed with the list. The circle of life, I suppose.

Aha!

2009-03-23T00:00:00.003-05:00

I'm feeling pretty good about my creative side stepping out today. Perhaps it was the fact that I started my day with Highlander Grogg... best brew evah!!

Anyway... I have not been inspired in a creative sense for quite a while. I have a plethora of various craft supplies that I have considered putting up for bids on eBay. I miss the joy that my handiwork gave me, mostly when I made things for others to enjoy. I sternly reprimanded myself (geez, I can be a real bitch!) and made a promise that within 6 weeks I would make 1 project per week or off to eBay we go.

In an effort to get some mileage out of my stash, I created a couple of ribbon organizers, much like the ones sold at craft stores for $15 +.

I gathered:

shoeboxes with lids
eyelet punch
hammer
dowel rod
Xacto knife
ribbon mess!

Granted the end result was a bit wonky! The slot was a bit slanted, I think it only adds to the charm of it all.

Here's how the final product turned out:

Death & Taxes

2009-03-17T20:05:00.004-05:00

Today, it takes more brains and effort to make out the income-tax form than it does to make the income.

~Alfred E. Neuman

With "TAX DAY" less than a month away, I felt compelled to complete filing my taxes. Paranoid as I am, I need to review the paper copy although I complete the FREE online version. Amazed that my son was much more expedient than I & has received his return. Ah, the exuberance of youth!

Happy filing everyone!

Sping!! **

2009-03-09T22:53:00.005-05:00

This bud's for you...

This is one of my favorite times of the year. The world returns to it's vibrant color palate of bright green, yellow, purple, pink and blue from that drab grey that enveloped us for 4 months.

There are many new projects with the arrival of spring, looking forward to the challenge.

**The title is deliberately misspelled (A poorly titled bulletin board I will NEVER forget, we laughed for a week)

Chicken Gyros...YUM!

2009-03-09T16:52:00.002-05:00

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Chicken-Gyros-with-Cucumber-Salsa-and-Tsatsiki-351874?mbid=rss_epinr

Sounds delicious... always need new ideas for the versatile chicken!! Can't wait to make it.

Sir, you are doing it all wrong...

2009-03-06T10:36:00.002-06:00

While working on some projects in the comfort of the local coffee shop, I can't help but overhear this gentleman who is apparently in sales for some type of software. He has a call list, highlighter & cell phone armed and dangerous... he seemed organized.

Then the calls began, his approach was brash, cold and seemingly unsuccessful. I shake my head quietly and see where things are going wrong.

This guy must have a reputation around town as he can't seem to get past the receptionist via telephone. The guy's boss shows up to compare notes on his progress & he has an impressive list (probably 40 +) of who he has contacted but no action on follow ups. He talks about problems but doesn't come up with solutions...it is evident that this company is hurting.

Shall I step over & introduce myself?? HA!

Musings....

2009-02-24T17:30:00.002-06:00

We become so vulnerable when we are without gainful employment. So many temptations to lure us away from the course. The computer screen blinking with shiny letters, a path to excitement, the local scrapbook store offering a "FREE" workshop (yeah, like I have the self-discipline to attend the workshop & walk out empty handed),or the comfortable sofa near the fireplace with the puppy dozing.

I think I've found a passion within me to wake early for a vigorous walk, coffee at the local coffee shop (my one indulgence) and work within my community to make it a better place. Laying around just isn't my style. I 've used this opportunity to have exeriences that (hopefully) enrich my life as well as re-connect with my family. I enjoy the stories shared by my parents, learning things about them that amaze me.

LIfe in the slower lane isn't so bad after all. Not a place I plan to linger, but I plan to enjoy the commute from this viewpoint while it presents itself.

my Mantra of the day....

2009-02-12T22:17:00.002-06:00

"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission".... that Eleanor Roosevelt was one smart cookie! :)

More chocolate... more wisdom

2009-02-04T15:59:00.002-06:00

Gotta love the Dove people! Not only do they make delicious chocolates, they find bits of wisdom to share with the world!

Today's thought: "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams"

I have been doing that for the past few weeks since becoming unemployed (YAY! I'm a statistic).
Although financially I am down in the dumps (makes you re-prioritize what is important to you), I couldn't feel more alive! So many possibilites are out there.

I have had opportunities to participate in meeting and activities I haven't been able to in over 10 years because of the nature of my (former) work. Meeting and reconnecting with people and learning new things about myself (or not so new, just laying dormant while I used my mind/body for working in a corporate environment).

I am energized, happy and enjoy taking on new adventures each day. And now... the adventure of dry laundry awaits.

My day

2009-01-27T21:37:00.003-06:00

Even in tough times... it's the little things that make things special.

My visitors

2009-01-26T14:50:00.007-06:00

Who's been creepin' round my back stair??

I love fresh fallen snow

Good Stuff!

2009-01-15T13:52:00.002-06:00

While rearranging my home office & reviewing my personal library, I rediscovered a gem! The Word Museum: The Most Remarkable English Words Ever Forgotten written by Jeffrey Kacirk is filled with words & their history. "Ninny-broth" was a term used for coffee back in the mid 1800's & "curglaff" is the shock that you feel in bathing when you get into cold water.

It is so entertaining to read these unusual terms. The English language is such a jumble of origins and some of the slang of years ago is so much more challenging than all the techno-speak & IM stuff of today.

I guess I must be a "quidnunc"(an inquisitive person; always seeking for news)!

The little speck of dust ...

2009-01-09T21:35:00.002-06:00

If you were to cite an experience that truly makes you feel insignificant in the larger sense of the universe, what would you say it is?

Excerpt from If--- Questions for the Soul by Evelyn McFarlane

One experience was watching the events unfold on September 11th. I recall watching people jumping from the towers, watching the carnage on the streets & feeling useless! It was VERY uncomfortable to watch (and you never really got away from it, as it encompassed all media). I felt naive in my understanding of world politics and religion, not being able to comprehend how a country could concoct such an act upon others.

I cannot say that I am much wiser. I do make attempts to "go beyond the headlines" with current events to understand more of the world that I reside.

I am still naive in many ways, maybe too trustworthy of people. I wish I had the ability to judge a person's true character so I don't invest time & energy on them if they become inconsequential.

Random thoughts ...

2009-01-03T19:51:00.002-06:00

Going through my 2008 Flavia calendar in an attempt to be more organized, I rediscovered a quote that made me instantly think of 4 specific people in my life.

Some people come into our lives,
leave footprints on our hearts
and we are never, ever the same.

Parenting a teenager

2009-01-01T20:38:00.002-06:00

Not sure if the title is an oxymoron or not. I have made a career working with parents of young children. The terrible 2's and ferocious 4's got nothin' on this teenager business! I am so very out of my comfort zone with a child who I thought I knew so well (heck, we shared my body for 9 mos.!!)

Not that parenting can ever be learned from a book or some wise statement (Lord knows I've tried!:)), but there are some pearls of wisdom out there of some survivors. This wisdom I accept willingly, not out of desperation (yet) but out of the puzzlement that has become my son.

The suggestion of having pictures of your teen around the house to comfort you when it was okay to be seen near you is a strategy I have recently implemented. My home (and a bit of my heart) seems to echo in his increasing physical absence. During the holidays, I found myself feeling melancholy; missing his wit,exuberance & engineering.

I have resolved to make the remaining family events when we are together to be those that will bring a smile to our hearts.

Teenagers require a sense of humor, but also a healthy dose of love and understanding in an unobtrusive way. Not sure if my kid understands that I know this, but now he does.

Is this what World Peace looks like?

2008-12-02T20:30:00.004-06:00

For a few minutes, it seems as if this man brought happiness to thousands of people in the world. Not sure of the whole story but I like the premise! Pretty cool stuff. Enjoy

Wisdom from a piece of chocolate...

2008-11-28T08:06:00.003-06:00

Yesterday I opened up (delicious)piece of Dove chocolate. The wrappers always have little messages on the inside.

My message was " Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances."

It made me think of Antione Ste. Exepury's book, The Little Prince. There is a part of that book where the fox tells the prince that it isn't with they eyes that we see what is essential, but with the heart. I don't recall the specific quote, but you get the idea.

Such a timely quote, where we seem to be blind-sighted by materials and destinations at this time of the year.

Wisdom from a piece of chocolate.... who knew?!

100 things you (now) know about me

2008-11-27T08:00:00.001-06:00

Got this from Sara's blog & decided to play along as well!

1. Started my own blog (and you visited it)
2. Slept under the stars
3. Attended a live play starring a family member
4. Visited Springfield, MO
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disney World
8. Held a baby only hours old
9. Climbed a mountain
10. Sang in front of people
11. Tried a new food
12. Reunited with an old friend via the internet
13. Watched a lightning storm
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Gone on a blind date
16. Cried yourself to sleep
17. Been to the top of the Gateway Arch
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Helped a stranger
20. Learned sign language
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a piglet
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Walked for a good cause
28. Ridden a horse
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Scored a goal in soccer
32. Been on a cruise
33. Drank beer with a nun
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Slow danced with a stranger
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Saw a crime committed in front of you
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Thanked a teacher (after 30 years)
41. Sung karaoke (sober!)
42. Seen the birth of a child
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Washington D.C.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your Wisdom teeth pulled
48. Gone fishing
49. Seen the Red Square in person
50. Been to Leningrad
51. Have had your heart broken
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Stayed up til midnight on NYE
57. Been so poor you sold a prized possession
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Have taken a CPR/First Aid course
66. Visited the place of your birth
67. Bounced a check -not proud moments
68. Flown in an airplane
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Touched a shark
74. Betrayed a friend's trust
75. Been fired from a job
76. Held a live starfish in your hands
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Liberty Bell in person
80. Have an autograph from a celebrity
81. Have a living will
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked the Liberty Trail
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Have written your name in the sand
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone's life
90. Read to a child
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Changed a flat tire
96. Climbed a 20 foot wall
97. Have shot a bulls-eye with a bow & arrow
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

Play along!

Would you? Could you?

2008-11-22T00:01:00.000-06:00

If you had to give up one of your 5 senses for the remainder of your life, which would you choose & why?

I am fond of all of my 5 well-functioning senses, but I think I would sacrifice my sense of taste (but I could still smell, I'd hope). This would help with weight management since I could not taste the delicious culinary creations. Definitely a deterrent to eating. The closest I have come to experiencing this sensation was when I was sick. I really didn't miss the taste sensation, but kinda remembered what certain foods smelled. Since I enjoy cooking, I would be at a disadvantage of tasting my creations, but providing food for others to enjoy would make me happy within the process.

Since I am visual person, I would have a hard time giving up sight. I enjoy photography and reading, things not easily translated into other modalities. Scrapbooking is an appealing hobby for me and the visual memories trigger other senses (mostly sounds). Also, today's environment is not user friendly to those with visual impairments (lots of corrective options, though).

I think olfactory (smell) senses are tied closely to memory banks within the brain. I mean, we have the reactive (eew! the milk is bad) or(uh, fire?!?) senses built within to keep us from harm. I am thinking more of, how I can walk into my grandmother's home after a decade absence and be inundated with memories just by smelling the air when opening the wooden door that leads to her home of over 60 years. Memories that are illuminated as I burn scented candles when decorating the family Christmas tree. There are memories still tucked away in my mind that have yet to be unleashed. Remember the concept of smell-o-vision ? I'm thinkin', a bit CrAzY, but I see where they were going with that!

Nor could I surrender the aural calm created by listening to music like Acoustic Alchemy or Dave Koz in stressful times. I couldn't bear missing opportunities to hear my son sing. These past 4 years, his voice has developed into this rich tone that just amazes me every time I hear him sing (serious music).Although I dislike having to LISTEN and be on alert throughout the day, I do like when I can be a passive rather than active listener.

Losing the sense of touch would make me feel dehumanized. In my profession (I am a child care manager), I am deluged with hugs, pokes and squeezes throughout my hectic day. These are some of the brighter parts of my day & remind me how important my job is to these little ones. I am not so inclined to give up something that is rewarding. I have not had many physical relationships in the past few years & I miss the caress of my neck, arms. I find that sense comforting & grounding, that perhaps allows for some inner peace.

Here's hoping I keep my senses with me for quite a while!

Modern-day Cheapskates

2008-11-17T22:58:00.002-06:00

After reading this article, I thought of my budget and how I try to monitor my spending. I certainly do not have a social life that empties my wallet. Heck, just traveling 80 miles round trip to work is enough to make me cry at the end of the day!

These are things I do as a practicing cheapskate:

* Visit the library often to get my literary fix.
* Enjoy creating home-made goodies that are far less pricier than bistro menu items.
* Have learned the value of Redbox (also library) rather than the box office ;we're talking big $$ these days.

* I print or e-mail my own photos to family & friends. Love the quality, but I have yet to take a professional caliber photo worthy of the $

* Keep the technology simple & up to date as possible. Seeking bargains, my laptop was a floor model, software discounts through graduate school program.

* Coupons, use them, it is surprising how much $ you save in a month. Be smart about it though.

* I love candlelight. I use candleight in the evening to save energy, make the house smell good & relax in the aroma that surrounds me.

After reading this article, I want to challenge myself, yet not put a burden on others to cover the check. As much as the economy is in a slump, I don't feel the need to spend the last of my savings on holiday gifts. I think that handmade gifts is the route I will be taking this year. I've tacked up many ideas on my inspiration board in my home office that I have yet to explore. I still think handmade gifts can be functional, not just that kitschy crap that ends up in garage sales in the spring. Not sure what the end result is going to look, but it will be worth trying!
Watch this space ...

Let's play... 20 questions!

2008-11-14T22:30:00.001-06:00

1. If you could take more control of one aspect of your life, what would it be?
I would like to control how much time/energy I use at work. I come home exhausted and too tired to enjoy being at home.

2. If you were to state the difference between the male soul and the female soul, what would it be?
The male soul seeks pleasure, the female soul,harmony

3. If you had to give control of your destiny to any one person, who would get it? Not sure I am ready to give up control to anyone in my life.

4. If after you die your spirit could protect anyone in the world, who would you pick? My brother

5. If you were to name the most comforting thing for you to hold in your hands, what would it be? Chloe, my dog, gives me comfort

6. If you were to leave instructions for what music would be played at your funeral or wake, what would it be? Oh, I've thought this out before.... I would have smooth jazz playing throughout the service, but fun stuff. I want people remembering the love I had for music in my life.

7. If you could learn one thing (but only one thing) about your own death right now, what would you want it to be? Was I with my family?

8. If you made a very big mistake of some kind, who, of the people you know, would you first confess it to? I guess I'd tell Ana (hopefully it wasn't with her)

9. If you were to describe your attitude toward sin, what would you say? Sin is succumbing to desire because of one's own weakness.

10. If you could ask a psychic one question, knowing you would get a true answer, what would you ask? Will I be with my soul mate through my sunset years?

11. If there was one primary law or principle you lived by, what would you say it was? Those who say it can't be done need to get out of the way of those doing it! (I read this in a magazine & was amazed at its honesty!)

12. If you had to name the best thing about getting older, what would you say it is? Hmmm, that you pawn off housework on your children?

13. If you were to select a person whose persona does not fit their body type, who would it be? Me - 100%

14. If you were to name three people throughout your life that helped to complete you as a person, who would they be? Sr. John (teach from the heart), Leo Buscaglia (keep the child inside you alive & playing), RT (making me a complete parent, which is what I guess is how it was supposed to be all along).

15. If you were to say there is a person who truly practices what they preach, who would it be? Hmmm, gotta get back to this one

16. If you were to name the most comforting place to be touched by another's hands, where would it be? My shoulders

17. If you were to name the one thing you have the most compassion for, what would it be? children... they are so vulnerable!

18. If you had to admit the most selfish thing you do on a regular basis, what would you say? Closing my door to be alone when I should be with my family.

19. If you were to design a room for contemplation, what would it look like, and what would be in it? Breezy, water falls, lots of fabrics in earth tones (moss, sand,chocolate) and candles, music (smooth jazz/new age/Celtic)

20. If you had to pick one dream you've had that came closest to coming true, which was it? Raising a child (although at times it may seem like a nightmare!)

In a need of a thunderstorm!

2008-11-13T20:28:00.002-06:00

We are a thunderstorm

individually,

we are single drops of rain,

falling silently into the dust,

offering scant promise of moisture thirsty land.

but together,

we can nourish the earth

and revive its hopes and dreams.

together,

we are a thunderstorm.

Poem by Amity Gaige

I was first introduced to this poem in college. In its simplicity, I find the message encouraging. After 20 years of life experience behind me, I revisit this work in a new light. Not only in a dynamic period in society, but also as a manager of people.

How does one foster the flame within them to want to help "nourish" the Earth, or their environment? Who will help you want to revive your hopes and dreams? No one will do it for you, that is certain.

I protect my flame daily & turn my back to the harsh wind of resistance. I refuse to allow my flame to die out, in fear that it will not re-light.

I am tired of feeling thirsty!

Leader of the pack? I think not!

2008-11-10T23:57:00.002-06:00

You want to run out in front, prepare to be tripped from behind. ~S.A. Sachs

Those who choose to be in the spotlight may get their opportunity, but not without a bit of poor footing on the way! I see that you study your script & play the role, but you are transparent,unfortunate & so predictable! I have watched your rehearsals from behind a curtain as you polish your skills.

It is time for a new script with a role that is less dramatic, that allows your intellect shine. Please redeem yourself, before it is too late.

Delish!!

2008-11-10T12:00:00.001-06:00

Thought about sharing the wealth of my Chili recipe. It is in high demand when Fall comes.

I have only entered this once in a chili cook-off, thinking of trying it again, for laughs.

The Goods..
1 1/2 pounds ground beef (lean)
1 pkg smoked sausage (I use lite/turkey)(sliced/quartered)
1 10 oz jar salsa (pick your heat level)
1 16 oz can V-8 (vegetable juice)
1 can tomato paste
1 8 oz can diced tomatoes
1 medium/large onion chopped
1 green pepper chopped
1 large can chili beans
1 medium can kidney beans
1 medium can black beans
2 Tbsp Cumin
4 Tbsp Chili Powder

For Toppings Bar:

scallions
sour cream
shredded cheese (cheddar & pepper jack are our faves)
salsa
guacamole
tortilla chips

The game plan...

In a large stockpot, combine salsa, V-8 juice, tomato paste & diced tomatoes. Allow to heat to a low boil.

Meanwhile,brown the ground beef with the onions (drain off fat). Saute the peppers with the sausage pieces. Season with Cumin & chili powder. Add to tomato mixture, stir well.

Simmer for 90 minutes on med-low heat, stirring occasionally to avoid burning. Drain/rinse black & kidney beans. Add to chili. Put the chili beans into the mix without draining (to retain flavoring). Stir well, simmer an additional 30 + on low until ready to serve.

In the last 1/2 hr before serving, prep your toppings bar (or put all the bowls of stuff on a lazy susan in the middle of the table for ease of access).

Gather up spoons & bowls and enjoy!

** This chili is best if it is chilled overnight (if it can last that long!)

Just wasting time...

2008-11-09T15:34:00.000-06:00

50 Random Questions

1. Where were you 3 hours ago?

At the store getting Chloe food

2. Who are you in love with?

no one @ present

3. Have you ever eaten a crayon?

Not that I can recall

4. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

My computer, printer, bookshelf & radio. Big box of papers that need to be recycled (too cold to go outside!)

5. When is the last time you went to the mall?

Last weekend with Tony for an ice cream fix

6. Are you wearing socks right now?

Yes, black fuzzy & warm!

7. Do you have a car worth over $2,000?

Yes, but trading it in next year.

8. When was the last time you drove out of town?

In June, road trip to Springfield

9. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?

10. Are you hot?

kinda personal, huh?

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?

A really crappy beer!

12. What are you wearing right now?

Black sweater& jeans

13. Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it?

I like the sweat equity in warm weather!

14. Last food that you ate?

My fabulous chili with all the goodies! (Too bad the beer was lousy)

15. Where were you last week at this time?

Home, doing laundry!

16. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?

Gloves

17. When is the last time you ran?

chased the dog yesterday! My knees are not set on "run"

18. What's the last sporting event you watched?

Hockey game with my dad

19. What is your favorite animal?

my puppy!

20. Your dream vacation?

A cabin by a lake, fireplace, live band, open bar & a fully stocked kitchen. When can I check in!?

21. Last person's house you were in?

You know, I really have NO idea

22. Worst injury you've ever had?

That crazy bladder infection that put me in the hospital last December the week before Christmas! That really sucked!

23. Have you been in love?

Yes,

24. Do you miss anyone right now?

My Baba. Sure wish she could be here for the holidays.

25. Last play you saw?

Arsenic & Old Lace at Marquette High school. It was AWESOME

26. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?

Wouldn't YOU like to know!

27. What are your plans for tonight?

Clearing off my desk & getting a couple of albums done for Cardinal Glennon

28. Who is the last person you sent a MySpace message or comment?

Sherrie

29. Next trip you are going to take?

Probably a college visit with Gabe

30. Ever go to camp?

OMG... lived at camp for 7 summers! So many memories!

31. Were you an honor roll student in school?

hahahahahahahahahahaha....no

32. What do you want to know about the future?

How much Gabe's college tuition is going to cost me!

33. Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?

just deodorant

34. Are you due sometime this year for a doctor's visit?

I am. I better get that appontment scheduled!

35. Where is your best friend?

I would guess she is at home taking a nap, she is super prego!

36. How is your best friend?

Knocked up!

37. Do you have a tan?

38. What are you listening to right now?

my mp3 player has Life in the Tropics by the Rippingtons

39. Do you collect anything?

dust bunnies!

40. Who is the biggest gossiper you know?

Let's not go there...

41. Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over?

2 years ago. I am on a path to recovery for my lead foot

42. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?

In take out cups

43. What does your last text message say?

I have a book on hold @ library

44. Do you like hot sauce?

on chicken, eggs & chili

45. Last time you took a shower?

This morning

46. Do you need to do laundry?

yes

47. What is your heritage?

Lithuanian

48. Are you someone's best friend?

I think so...

49. Are you rich?

yes.

50. What were you doing at 12AM last night?

Working on a photo album for Cardinal Glennon

Amatokin Wrinkle Cream

Top Ten List - Best Myspace Quizzes

Improvement Plan

2008-11-08T19:37:00.003-06:00

Don't spend your precious time asking "Why isn't the world a better place?" It will only be time wasted. The question to ask is "How can I make it better?" To that there is an answer.

a quote from Leo Buscaglia. I came across a journal I kept in high school that had quotes from him jotted in the margins.(I guess a blog is a new way of journaling?!)

The world has changed so much in my lifetime (some for the good, sometimes not). I find it hard to comprehend what people who are much older than I, are feeling in this moment. History has unfolded right before us! This planet has gone through quite a transformation this week. I saw an article in the WSJ with a photo of a newspaper headline in Italy that read "Il Mondo Cambria" (the world changes). I am energized by the changes, yet cautiously optimistic that those who hold different views will keep their minds & heart open for the new leadership.

Closer to home, I have recently tried to brighten the world through my own actions. Within the past 2 weeks, I have brought magazines to the senior supported living complex, brought my neighbors paper to their doorstep to avoid going out in the cold air, given anonymous gift cards to brighten someones day, and helped a parent load their car with groceries so they could get their child who was in major meltdown mode into their car seat. Today, I visited a gallery exhibit opening of my grade school gym teacher. He was thrilled that I still remembered him. He made my world brighter many years ago just by being the kind, talented soul that he is (and I told him that!)

Although the movie "Pay It Forward" was kinda goofy, the concept of doing a good deed in hopes that it will be passed on is heart-warming. This time of year is popular for people to go good Samaritan work by helping in a food pantry, donating coats and the cash donations. The act of giving feels rewarding enough to feel the energy year round. Try it, you'll like it!

There are lives I can imagine without children but none of them have the same laughter & noise.

2008-11-06T21:30:00.002-06:00

I work with children daily. The giggles, shrieks & sobs are part of the daily acoustics at my job (along with the telephone, keyboard & printer). However, the sounds of children are comforting to me. I enjoy the incessant "why ?" questions of preschoolers, the emerging language of toddlers, and the stories of the"big" kids with larger than life details of storytelling.

Without this soundtrack, my life would seem less colorful, less rewarding, and much more serious. Children bring levity to so many conversations and situations. Don't just listen to the children, HEAR them. All to often, I have my "grown up moments" where I smile and dash off the the next task at hand. But sitting in the classroom with my little buddies in the two year old classroom this morning, brought it all back into focus. Thanks, guys, I needed that!

It's Showtime, folks

2008-11-03T22:45:00.004-06:00

We have finally arrived at the big day. The flow of all the articles, interviews, debates, awful endorsements, and parodies will trickle down to a mere drip (not the candidate!).

I am awed by the passion that people have for their respective candidate or position. I hope that in the booth, people really take a serious look at the issues they support rather than the hoopla that either party brings to this campaign. In the past few months, I have observed actions and heard comments that seem disturbing when supporting their choice. I won't get into the details but I feel some people voting may not be fully informed on the candidate's issues or qualifications.

This election is undoubtedly a historic event on several levels, and I look forward to opening a history book & sharing with my grandchildren the passion that was brought out in people because of this election. The right to vote is a privilege in this democratic country & I hope people are SMART about their vote & be adult about the results, since they had a direct say in the outcome (in a small way, that electoral college thing still drives me crazy!)

Now go out and vote! Please....

Help our Mother (Earth)

2008-10-26T21:18:00.000-05:00

The United States is resident to many well educated people. It does baffle me that another country was able to not only redevelop land that was once used as a landfill into the amazing structure that plans for erosion, but was eco-savvy enough to have the bio gas that is released from the decomposition of the landfill converted into electricity. How cool is that!? While here @ home, there are people who are not willing to compromise on more efficient ways to support our struggling mass transit system. We shut down a major artery into the city for 3 + years & they still don't see the "forest for the trees."... jeez!

http://www.cnn.com/2008/TECH/science/10/24/waf2008.energy.waste.recycling/index.html

Educating the community on Autism

2008-10-12T00:45:00.001-05:00

Today was the Walk Now for Autism in Forest Park. The event had over 20,000 people participating. It was great to see the array of colored shirts that represented the walking teams, which were dedicated to someone affected by Autism. I was struck with 2 feelings simultaneously. First I thought wow, such a great turnout, then doing some calculating how many affected individuals were represented in one group today. So many people with stories of hope... progress... frustration.. fear... and PRIDE.

Walking for Tony today, I was filled with a bubble of gratitude for the professionals researching this disorder and families willing to try anything, in hopes that it may flip the switch. I remember the trips to the Spitz Clinic in Media, PA where we met with top names in the field back in the 80's. Tony's brain surgery. Days filled with patterning exercises that my parents & I did with him throughout each day. The glimmer in Tony's eye when he remembers the good stuff. The moments that I shared with Tony that he spoke to me, ever so briefly, and the moment vanished.

Then,my thoughts drifted to the people in my life who are affected as well. Their children are significantly younger than Tony. How lucky they are (in relation to the under educated 70's era) to have the resources & support of professional agencies. Legislatively, we still have a ways to go with the financial & medical support that is needed. After the walk, I met up with the local radio station & thanked them for spotlighting & sponsoring the event and giving autism a voice in the community. This was not a heavily covered media event but the station did a nice job of discussing issues throughout the week & the morning show team stayed through the event. I was able to share Tony's story and describe growing older & the continued challenges. It wasn't a sad story to tell, because Tony has benefited so much from caring staff members, local community members who allow him to enjoy life (like Doc's Harley's in Kirkwood) and a family (including the crazy pup who does her part to keep him in line) that pulled together to make it work.

Canine Parenting

2008-10-06T20:37:00.000-05:00

Dog ownership: This is not for the weak or timid! We brought Chloe Simone into our home about a year & 4 months ago at the young age of (roughly)8 weeks. She was just this tiny black fluff ball that was at our mercy. She has certainly grown this past year. We have had free romps through the subdivision, close encounters with wildlife (squirrels & rabbits are FUN to chase) and some great times playing in the water in the hot summer sun. This past weekend, however, we had a "first" (at least that we are aware of) that wasn't such fun. I see Chloe stretched out comfortably in the living room mouthing something. Then I see it is shiny & long, like a pin or paperclip. As I do my best to have her trade me for a piece of bread I see her "successfully" swallow the object. I watch her for any ill effects, read up on emergency vets in the area to do an x-ray (not in the current budget) & get to over see her eliminations for signs of blood. 24 hours from the ordeal, she has YET to show any ill effects from her shiny treat. Needless to say I have swept through the house & checked to ensure mini objects are well contained. And the waiting continues!!!

Fall is here

2008-10-05T20:07:00.000-05:00

This weekend was a wonderful outdoor time. Lots of yardwork & tree trimming was on the to-do list. Seems as though when the weather gets cooler, the world becomes a more cozy place to exist. Our senses get a jolt from the warm cinnamon aroma from apple cider, the crunch of the leaves as we walk in the woods, juicy apples with sticky caramel await after supper.

Looking forward to cooking chili, pumpkin soup, carrot cake & G's favorite loaded baked potato soup.